An Introduction: The Starting Line

     Okay, so I made this blog as a way to share the changes going on in my life to my family and friends. But first; a little back story so everyone has an idea of whats going on at the moment.

     In September of 2010 my family lost my great-grandmother, and this past Halloween we also lost lost my great-grandfather, her  husband who were both large parts of my life, and honestly, life feels empty without both of them. In their memory, and as a way to find closure in my own weird sort of way, there are two feathers on my back with their initials cradled in them, a halo on each stem. My grandmother's is blue, and my grandfather's is maroon. The colors were chosen because in my mind, and as far back as I can remember each of them would always wear these colors, to me its just the color I think of when I think of them.

     Then, in January the most impossible thing anyone could imagine happened. We lost my baby brother Chris. We were a year and six days apart exactly, but it really didn't matter, everyone always thought we were twins anyway, at least until he shot up over me, then they thought he was the oldest. But even still it didn't matter, as close as Bubby and I were we might as well have been twins. This is not just heart breaking to my family but to all the people who he touched in his lifetime. He was one of the most amazing soul's a person could ever meet. He was at the Great Lakes Naval Academy for boot camp when he passed, we still don't know how he died...We are waiting for more information. Its been a month this past Saturday. 

     This is my guy Sean. He is currently deployed. He left in January right before all the craziness broke loose. He is a nice guy who isn't afraid to put some sense into me. Sean takes good care of me, and worries even though we all are constantly thinking of him anyway. Believe it or not folks my family actually approves of this one! He's definitely a keeper, especially in my eyes. I love his family who is full of wonderful people who only want to look after their own. Sean, despite his distance has done so well to take care of me the best he can. 

From here, I'm not sure what I'm going to do. In the end my hopes for this blog is to possibly find a way to be motivated forward in order to take the baby steps necessary to move forward with life, and start to live it again. If there is anyone I can help by sharing my stories, and the many changes that life throws my way then in my mind this blog has been more than successful. 

The reason for the title "Starting A Journey" is because this is the starting of a new chapter in life. This is going to be a story of firsts, and new beginnings; 

~ A first anniversary 

~ A first step toward facing the world again

~ The start of a life with a significant other (Fall/Winter)

~ The start of a life away from home (Fall/Winter)

~ A first year... 

And so many more things to learn and discover. 

To Be Continued...