Time Passes...

Idawild Park: Story Book Forest
(Make Believe)

So this has been a while since I have posted a blog...I've learned so many things in the year that has just passed its just a tad far fetched to even believe that it has all occurred within the span of one year.

I now know the pain of loosing a brother, and best friend...

I know the emptiness that accompanies entering a house once filled with life, and covered in memories to find the cause of those memories void...

I know what it is to loose two great-grandparents, who were great grandparents...

I know the patients, and difficulty of a deployment from the partner's side of the fence...

I know how it feels to wake up and finally decided its enough, and that its time to take a stand...

I now know what it is to walk into a room and feel like he might still be coming home...

I know how cruel people can be once you take such stands, how they say that it can be fixed and then tear it back down of their own fruition...

I have been reminded just how precious the small gifts that we are given are, that even if some find it frivolous art, and pen to paper are just as significant as doctors and lawyers...

That I need to do what makes me happy, and do something that I feel is right, and not what other people expect are the right things for me...

If a person does not wish to change at their core then they never will defy the binds that hold them, but in its base sense change is indeed possible...

That consideration must be given in all things, as well as patients...

Patients is one of the hardest things in this life to acquire along with the compassion to see the situation from the other side of the fence...

I know that people's decisions are their own, and if you are to blame the fault is your own, and that fault sometimes is a necessity to move forward in one's life...

McConnell's Mill

I am not the Samantha-Jo Corrine from a year ago...

I am a little more reckless...
I am a little less shy...
I am a little more cautious...
I am a little more bold...
I am a little more wiser...
I am a little older...
I'm a little more understanding...
I am a little more tired...
I am a little calmer...
I am a little more open...
I am a little harder...
I am a little smarter, and a little more ignorant...
I know better now...
I am a little more set...
What there is in front of you is what there truly is...
I am not Sammey-Jo-Jo...

I have seen too much, and held a statue too long...
I am the make of all my parts,
all these parts make up a woman who is above all else still underneath
all the firm reasoning above,
a child trying to find her way...

I will keep trying.
I will keep moving forward.
I will stay strong.
I will remain compassionate.
I will remain kind, understanding, and as truthful as I can be.
I will be who I am, the composition of all these odds and ends.
I will be Samantha-Jo Corrine.

McConnell's Mill